Haruhi's Journey
by Broken Kilter Express
Summary: Sometimes weird things happen thanks to Haruhi, and sometimes you're in another universe. Now we ride with the girl with the talking motorcycle in the beautiful world. Kino No Tabi x Haruhi Suzumiya crossover.


**Note: With Kino's Journey, I only got into this show monday, but I loved it so much that I watched the OVA & all 13 episodes in a 5 ½ hour stretch. I would have not written this though if not for the suggestion of Misaki, who thought it would be a good idea for a KNTxTMOHS xover, linking my usual fandom. This chap is written by me, with Misaki moving to do later chapters.**

**Here is a prologue, the disclaimer is "I don't own either franchises used, they are owned by Nagaru Tanigawa and Keiichi Siigsawa."**

Kyon always finds it to be a mystery. Just why does Haruhi do the things she does?

Cause it seems that he has ended up in a strange universe.

It was a few days ago that Haruhi had gone on an anime bender, watching for an entire weekend a whole large number of shows. She bellowed about Gurren Lagann, she raved of Fate/Stay(She even bought and beat the game in only a day) and then got very intense when Kino no Tabi came up.

And now he wonders, just where the hell is he?

The place being referred to is none other than a dirt road, somewhere amidst a place called nowhere.

Haruhi, the champion girl she is, decided to leave Kyon behind because, "You'll slow me down you slob. I have to scout for us. I'm going up ahead.

He continued to move further afield, noticing the clouds drifting on in the morning sky. Somehow, they woke up in a field in what appeared to be an unknown, undiscovered place, where though there seemed like a road running through, it was dangerously close to being called complete wilderness.

Ah, the bliss of surprise.

"KYON!!!"

"What Haruhi?"

"Have you seen anything yet?"

"No. All I've done is admire the sky and walk on the road."

"You idiot, you should have been concentrating!

"Well, what have you seen?"

Haruhi turned and huffed, "There's a tiny lodge nearby. Lets head to it."

.

_POV: Kyon_

Somehow, life gets more interesting when you find that even though it looks like the middle of nowhere, it is in fact, merely the halfway point between two small places between the middle of nowhere.

"Kyon, you have any money?"

"I do."

She sticks her hand out. Damn it.

I give her my cash, all 10000 yen and she hands it to the clerk, a nice older woman by the name of Chikako.

She leads us to a room at the end of a hall. Haruhi asks where we are...

"Why, you're between the Land of Dreamers and the Land of Heathens."

That doesn't even sound like the name of a country, or two. Has the definition changed?

"A country is considered a consolidation of people living close together, that's all, some are large, and some are small."

Something about that doesn't sound right. If a country is just people living together like in a town, then they'd be city states right?

"Yes, that's the common kind you'll see across the continent."

Hmm...are we even on earth?

"Yes you are. Are you well? It seems you have gone under a bout of confusion."

Tell me about it.

Haruhi, in her infinite contemplations, asks the most important questions, namely...

"Where is there any food?"

The older woman, Chikako responded, "If you would like to take a seat at the outside patio, I can have a meal prepared for you."

"That's great! Thank you so much!"

Haruhi skips while I shuffle toward the outside door and there, I see a table with three chairs, one padded, two wooden.

The queen takes her seat in the comfort of the padded.

"Haruhi, how did this all start?"

"I don't know, I was just sleeping in my bed and thinking about a show I watched and then I ended up waking next to you in a bush. Can YOU tell me how this started?"

No, I can't. You got my tongue with this.

We savored the silence that befell us for the next few minutes. Our food arrived, nothing odd, everything delicious and gorged ourselves there. Or rather it was Haruhi who was the pig, I was merely the one who ate like a normal human being. Ha, Haruhi looks quite odd when she eats, like she transforms from pretty to kind of like a small mammal, squashed over her meal chewing, kinda cute.

It was here when we heard the klaxon of the motor in the distance...

.

_The buzz and vibrations of Hermes were particularly strong lately_, thought Kino.

_Maybe I have to get him a tune-up._

"Kino," spoke the motorrad beneath her.

"Yes?"

"The valves are getting old, sometime I need new ones."

"OK, we'll look into it. I see an inn."

The traveler and motorrad drew closer to the said place to stay.

In front of the place, a small patio jutted from it. She noticed there, two individuals. One was a boy with a stoic expression that let out a little irritation, and the other, a girl that showed in her eyes a continuous wave of energy. It seemed that they had finished their food.

Kino spoke to them, "Hey, are you travelers? Is this place a good place?"

Haruhi took the initiative, "No, we are merely the SOS brigade leader and Subordinate, no need for you to bother us, now stop."

_Great job there, Haruhi,_ thought the annoyed Kyon, _alienate us from total strangers._

The thing that surprised them was when Kino noticed them together and started to smile to herself, "I see. I'll leave you two alone together."

The pair blushed. Haruhi more visibly. The arrival said nothing about her thought directly, as is her policy to hold her tongue till she has solid facts, but she implied it in her words very subtly what she thought about them.

"Hey, don't make assumptions about people you don't know. Umm, wait a second, what are you?"

Kino blandly returned, "I'm a traveler. I'm one who travels."

Haruhi's expression changed, "...Traveler. Whats that? Like someone who goes on vacations?"

This confused Kino, who expected they must at least know and have seen what travelers are, since they've come to an inn. _These two have never seen travelers before?_

She left their sight without a word, turning to the door and entering the building to sign in. Haruhi started staring at the entrance with an expression, the one that Kyon feared the most...

Curiosity.

_Uh-oh..._

-

Kino rummaged in her pocket to leave the innkeeper Chikako some currency. Ten, twenty, thirty...

Then a force of unimaginable power came down upon her hard. She was in a vise grip.

The girl from outside was overpowering her.

_WHAT!?_

Haruhi continued to drag her off to the outside. She did not expect the power in this girls grip. As Kino struggled, Haruhi opened the door with one hand and took the traveler onto the patio.

When Kyon saw this, he face palmed.

"Haruhi, what are you doing?"

"Ah! Hey, what is this? Why are you-"

"SHUT UP! I'll be asking the questions."

At this line, Kino was thrown into the third chair by the supernatural schoolgirl.

Haruhi stood there with her eyes shut, meditating on her choices of what to say. It made Kino and Kyon uneasy, and Hermes was bothered in a curious sense.

"OK, first, your name."

"I am Kino. I am a tra-"

"ONLY ANSWER WHAT I TELL YOU DO!"

Awkward silence.

Haruhi stared straight into Kino's eyes. It wasn't often this happened, but Kino was afraid.

"What is your name?"

"I just said--"

"WHAT IS YOUR NAME?"

"Kino." she said, as she regained her cool demeanor.

"What do you do?"

"I'm a traveler, I am one who travels."

Haruhi looked at her, "I see, so what does a traveler do?"

"I travel. It's my life to seek out and explore the world."

"I see...."

A moment of silence. A wind moves fast. FWACK! The movement is caught.

Kino catches Haruhi's fist before it strikes her. It surprises both Kyon and Haruhi to see such lightning speed.

Kino only stares coldly.

Haruhi slowly retracts her hand, "Hey, you're really fast."

"I practice." She does not say she practices drawing her persuader at dawn, or that she has killed before. It's best sometimes to keep them ignorant.

"Well, I have an interesting feeling from looking at you, like I know you from somewhere. Could you tell me where you're heading?"

"The land of heathens. I'll stay there for three days and learn all I can, then move on."

Haruhi turns her head to look at the motorrad nearby. She walks up to it, and stares at it closely.

"What an ugly bike."

A voice emanates, "HEY, I'M A BEAUTIFUL BIKE! HOW DARE YOU!" The voice scares Haruhi enough to make her fall on her posterior.

And then, she is absolutely floored.

"Oh, my god.....WOW, this is FANTASTIC, WHERE DID YOU GET HIM? WHATS HIS NAME?"

Kino was once again pleasantly surprised. She never saw someone who was as enthusiastic and amazed about a talking motorrad. Talk about changing your mind on something.

"My name is Hermes. How she got me was a long story."

.

Haruhi continued to stare and pester Hermes as Kino went to pay her inn fee. Kyon walked up to her to ask a few questions.

"Kino."

"Yes....? Whats your name?"

"I have a real name, but everyone calls me Kyon."

"Ah, that sounds like Kyun. Heh."

"I have to ask, do you know what place this is?"

"What do you mean?"

And Kyon revealed to Kino some startling truths.

"So...this dimension was created by her? I can't really believe that."

They stare as Haruhi tries to mount Hermes, who protests it by yelling and screaming.

"Yes, this whole world comes from a work of fiction. She read the work in which you star. It seems she has no idea. Her memories are fuzzy."

She hid the feelings of wonder it made to know that your entire world was fake. It could create an existential crisis, begging her to ask, "Was she always the sort to do these sorts of things?"

"Well, she was always the type to dream things up, not realizing that she has the power to make anything come true."

"Hmm, so if she wanted to, she could destroy the world?"

"It's even thought by Koizumi that she already did, 4 years ago."

"I'm sorry, uh...Koizumi?"

"Oh, I forgot to tell you about the SOS brigade. We are a collection of members of a club Haruhi formed, so that she could search for the supernatural, like esper psychics, aliens, and those who travel through time."

"Wow, and she's their leader?"

"She is also the key to data evolution, a crack in time, and god. Shes got a lot under her belt."

This made Kino laugh, most joyously, "Hahahaha, I never thought In the past several years I've traveled, I would find something as interesting as this."

"And it seems she's also interested in you. When she's curious, she will never stop pestering you."

"Ahh, I see."

The motorrad finally revved up. "Uhoh..."

Haruhi left, flying into the air before coming down on the main road. As she rode off, Kino and Kyon wore shocked and appalled expressions.

"WHHAAAAA!!!"

"BRING YOUR HEAD DOWN!"

"OK!"

And it was here when an interesting thing occurred, that Haruhi showed that she was in fact a natural rider.

She listened to the information fed to her from Hermes on how to ride. It wasn't cause he wanted to teacher her, he just didn't want to die.

"Lower the amount of gas!"

"OK!"

"Now, press on the hand break!"

And as she did, the motorrad slowed to a halt.

It then gracelessly keeled over. "OW! You don't deserve to ride me if you can't keep me stable."

"Well, sorrr~eee~."

Kino looked upon Hermes to find if any permanent damage was done. It turned out to be fine.

Haruhi turned toward her to apologize. She received a smack. As tears formed up, Kino responded...

"Don't touch my motorrad."

Kino then pushed Hermes into the inn. Left behind were the startled faces of Haruhi and Kyon.

.

Their evening was a quiet, somber affair, contaminated by the infection of what happened earlier. Haruhi was not sulky as much as she was in the reverie of melancholy, like the things she wanted turned on her and did not want her. Kyon ate his meal quietly. Haruhi barely touched her plate.

Kyon was almost about to leave for the room, when a hand stopped him. "Kyon."

"I want to apologize for being a bad leader earlier, I shouldn't have touched her things."

Kyon, the type to always expect Haruhi to remain the same, was looking at her as if she had just had every switch reset. She was genuinely sorry.

Of course, when she works in her brigade talk, its usually about duty more than empathy.

Kyon did have a thought though. Maybe he could convince the traveler to hear Haruhi out.

He entered the small inn and traveled to a door at the end of the hall, where Kino had requested for the most privacy.

He knocked, and asked to enter. No response.

Hoping to check if she were asleep, he turned the knob. It was unlocked. He opened it.

There it was, the Motorrad Hermes. It was silent, not speaking as if it was an illusion that what happened earlier was a dream.

As he took a step forward, he heard an audible click and a metallic surface touched his skin.

Kino's gun was pressed to his jaw.

"You...." She withdrew her weapon.

"I wanted to talk to you. Its about earlier."

"OK, go ahead."

"Now I was with Haruhi and she apologized to me for what she did, and she wanted to apologize to you for what she did. If I brought her here, would you hear her out?"

Kino was silent, her face stoic. Then it brightened with a slight smile. "OK, go ahead." She holstered her firearm as Kyon walked out to retrieve Haruhi.

What returned was a startled Haruhi, whose eyes went wide upon landing on Kino.

"Kino...umm...about earlier....listen..." she was hesitant.

She fell to her knees, "I'M SORRY FOR WHAT I DID EARLIER!"

Kino, her eyes completely widened now, stayed quiet for a moment before....

She laughed, like she had seen something of incredible humor. How unexpected.

"Its fine, its fine, heh....I'm not that angry about it now, since you decided to say something to me. It sounds like the kind of thing you don't normally do. To be honest, I don't think I've ever gotten that angry about someone doing something like that since I shot this man for coming too close."

Haruhi and Kyon straightened up.

This only made her laugh once more, "Ha ha, it wasn't fatal and it was only in the leg. Plus, he was drunk."

"OH! Good!..." Said a relieved Haruhi.

"You know, its not me you should apologize to now, its him."

She points toward the bike, which released a "DAMN STRAIGHT!" Into the air.

"Oh, heh, OK." She walks toward the motorrad. "Listen, I'm sorry for earlier."

"Well, if you are willing to ask for cordon, I'm happy to give it to you."

Kino corrects him, same as she has to every time, "I think you meant 'Pardon', Hermes."

"Oh, yeah, that."

Kino turns to them, "Well then, now that we've straightened this up, we have no hard feelings then."

Haruhi took this chance to come out of nowhere with a question, "Hey, when are you going to leave?"

"Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow?! Come on, how about you stay a little longer?"

"Ah, but I gotta go. I have to go to the land of heathens and see all I can."

"Aww." Haruhi was disappointed. "Can we go with you?"

"I travel alone, I prefer just Hermes as company."

"Huh? A Motorrad? That's not company! Don't you need people?"

"I'm always meeting new people. If I stayed longer than 3 days in a place, then I would cease to be a traveler. Its who I am."

"Hmm." Haruhi thought to herself.

Kyon knew she was thinking. A bad sign...

She turned to Kyon, "Lets become travelers too!"

Oh lord, not this. Not this of all things.

"Haruhi, we don't have supplies, money or a way around. How do you expect us to go anywhere?"

She points to Kino, "We'll join her."

Thus, a WHAT? Came from Kyon, Kino and Hermes.

.

It was the earliest time before dawn. Kino did what she always does in this hour.

Practicing her draw with her firearm. She was doing it quite quickly. Why?

She had to get going before Haruhi woke up and demanded to get on. Even after an argument that 3 individuals could not get on the motorrad, she steadfastly refused to back down. Now she had to make sure she got past her morning routine before she ended up a host to a pair of people.

She snuck out as quietly as she could, with Hermes in tow. She saw the sky starting to blue. The sun would come soon.

She revved the engine.

Two seconds later, a sound of shuffling and the feeling of arms wrapping around her made her realize...

They had been waiting the whole time for her to get up. And she was unable to slow down right for the amount of inertia now produced by all three of them.

.

As the motorrad Hermes continued to speed on, Kino felt a dose of irritation.

She was slowed down because of 3 passengers. One of which was exceptionally annoying...

"WOW! We're going really fast! This is so awesome! Kyon would probably never let me drive you know. But he's a crappy driver, like with go-karts! I could drive much better! But you're an awesome driver, too! How fast can we go? Do you stop a lot? I bet you do. Ever stay longer than three day? Probably not. Hey, look! A lizard! Ever have a pet! Like a dog? I like dogs. They are- GACCCKKKK! UUUUURRRRK!!! AGGGGGGHHH!!!"

Kino thought amusingly to herself, _...I probably should have said something about the bugs. At least her mouth is shut now._

_Heh heh heh...._laughed Hermes to himself.

Kyon could only wish he could facepalm.

-

**You'll see more, stay tuned.**

**Note: Motorrad = Motorcycle in Kino's Journey Terminology. Persuader = Gun.  
**


End file.
